3 years of wasted love

It's 5 in the morning and u can't fall asleep.normally you would be dying for sleep, but lately i feel a cold distant from you.you have someone u miss,i know.i have seen these signs before.the reason you can't sleep it's because you miss her and her is not me because here i am lying on an empty cold bed waiting for you while u busy warming someone else's bed and heart.i don't think i can take it anymore.after 3 years,i never knew our love meant nothing to u at all.now i know how hurt it is to be the only care enough for this relationship.i guess i'm never good enough for u?first year i had to fight for ur attention from a video game.is as though is not pathetic enough then ur work and now her?after 3 years that's how insignificant my love to u?i think i would be fine if it's all end now.maybe i would feel better instead of lonely and miserable all the time?i don't think my heart can bare all these pain anymore.maybe i really don't understand because i thought loving someone is wanting to spend each moment with that person but i guess in ur case,u barely see me and yet u feel suffocated to even want to spend more than 2 hours with me a day provided with all the incoming distraction.i guess is safe to say we're over.every hint you throw indicate that u no longer care for me and i no longer interest u anymore.u're just doing it because it's an obligation not out of sincerity.the sign is too obvious.there's no more love for me anymore.there's only an obligation.i'm sick of crying myself to sleep.i'm sick of feeling unwanted by the one person that i want the most.i think at the end of the day we both know this isn't going to work out.i dunno why r u still holding on.but i know why am i holding because i love u so much and it hurts!i wish i could be as heartless as u and just do whatever u want to do without me.when my mac reboot and i was upset over all the missing photos,were u there to comfort me?NO!there's the only thing that contain our memory from the past when we were truly happy and now just like our love,it's gone and i will nvr get back no matter how hard i try.i think it's the right to do.i don't want to be holding you back.u could be happy and i won't know.so go on and have a glorious moment of ur life without me.continue on ur quest without me because i don't think i can take another blow to my heart.it took me the longest time to heal and it's still healing.i wanna be happy again.i don't remember the last time i was actually happy knowing the fact i had u.i used to smile and lid up every time someone mention ur name and glow in pride to tell people u r mine.but now the very mention of u hurts like needle stabbing thru my heart knowing u don't feel the same way about me.the very reason why we stay together is so that we could strengthen our relationship not making it worst but i guess is all too late.nothing will ever be the same anymore just like my mac,what is gone is gone no matter how hard i try.it's no longer the same.all i could say is i love u too much.i guess a little too much that ironically made u love me less because all i wanted was u but me is the only thing u didn't want.so i guess it's safe to say u'll be happier without me because the thought me no longer make u smile,coming home to me has became a burden to u and u no longer anticipate my msg or calls anymore.u have someone else to fulfill these voids while i stupidly let u of all people be my sole happiness.